Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Hardcore Justice!

And so joins the other half of this dynamic duo...

Ali. Unashamed fangirl. Or, as Mehe and I determined earlier, the Jerry "The King" Lawler to her Jim Ross. (PUPPIES!!!!!)

Several months ago, I finally sat down and watched a whole episode of TNA Impact! I texted Mehe during the show to ask her if they were always this passionate. Turns out, they are. It was very jarring to me, and as a matter of fact, the only TNA I watched after that was to tune in the night after the infamous Sting/Hardy match to see how they were gonna treat that incident. I tuned in, they immediately buried Jeff, and I tuned out again. I wasn't able to watch again until my boyfriend clued me in on HOW to approach this company. "You can't watch it for the story," he told me, "But the wrestling is amazing."

He was right. I watched the very next week, and I was just in time for the buildup to Destination X. Even though at the time I had no idea who half these guys were, I watched that. So I've been following for about a month and a half. Hardcore Justice (SING IT) was this past Sunday. So! In order:

X-Division title: First of all, what the hell was Kendrick wearing? Actually, I have to admit that I have no other outstanding thoughts from this match. When Kendrick won, I turned to Mehe and asked, "Does this mean it's Hammer Time now?"

Knockouts Tag: I love Tara. I've finally gotten used to referring to her as Tara. Rosita and Sarita... don't know much about them, but I do have to say that I really hate that little dance they do as part of the Mexican America entrance. It just looks lazy and uncoordinated. Maybe if the girls were closer to the same height. Or seemed to have any kind of fire that you normally expect from a performer appearing from backstage. You know what? I don't think I would like it even then. Moving on, I'm told that Sarita has something or other going on with her face. Still, that mask was frightening. She looked like something out of a slasher film! Which again, would probably work better if Rosita wore a mask too. Perhaps to support her partner?

BFG: The Pope v. Devon: I like this rivalry going into the match. The thing I like about it is that, unless I'm completely missing something, there's no real clear villain. Pope is just trying to be friendly, and Devon is just playing the overprotective father. When the match began, Pope was doing all he could to lay down for Devon and let him have the points. Since Devon was having none of it, he started going through the motions of having a match, and by the end, he was really wrestling and even came away with the win. He looked sad to have had to do it, but on the other hand, Devon actually looked impressed that he took the effort. I have to say I am probably most looking forward to seeing how this one plays out on Thursday.

Knockouts Championship: My first taste of Mickie James was her whole fangirl story with Trish over on WWE. I liked her then, and I like her now. So sue me. I'm also growing fond of Winter, so this was another match I was looking forward to. I was a little distracted by Mickie's hair (seriously, not sure what she was going for, but I don't think it panned out), but I honestly wasn't sure what to expect of the outcome. It didn't disappoint. Winter ended up going full Muta on Mickie and taking the title from her. A little distraction by Angelina Love probably didn't hurt.

BFG: Crimson v. RVD: This match happened. Jerry Lynn ended up costing RVD the match and actually lost him 10 points. I think this brought us up to speed on the rules of the scoring finally. I would say more about this match, but honestly Mehe and I spent most of the time talking about RVD's awesome ass and thighs and the terrible things we would do to them if we ever got hold of them. You know, the usual.

Fortune v. Immortal: You know what? Not gonna lie. Don't remember this one at all. Not even sure if we were still talking about the Jerry Lynn interference or what. Complete mystery.

Bully Ray v. Ken Anderson: THE grudge match of the show. Also included the best spot of the night. While Anderson was doing is regular entrance, Bully Ray showed up behind him and smiled smugly at the thought of ambushing him. Didn't work out that way. After his first "MISTER ANDERSON" he followed immediately with, "Yeah I know he's behind me" and proceeded to lay out Bully Ray. Not only that, once his foe was suitably subdued, he took the time to grab his mic and finish with his second "ANDERSON!" He didn't end up taking the match all the way home, but I have a feeling that Immortal may have an opening for a new acting leader.

Tag Team Championship: Beer Money took on Mexican America. Who had their own flag. And we had to watch that awful dance again. I think I finished the block I was crocheting during this match. I probably should have been paying attention, but I kind of wasn't. Sorry :(

World Heavyweight Championship: Kurt Angle challenged Sting and the Insane Icon took the bait. It was a good match even without the twist ending. Remember how I said Immortal might have a spot open? Looks like Kurt's the man for the position. Hogan came to the ring and brought a chair with him. After snatching the chair, and chasing Hulk out, Angle took the paper ref opportunity to use the chair on Sting and pick up the victory. I am actually looking forward to Thursday.

Whew! And just think... I haven't even talked about Monday Night Raw yet!

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