Ohh... here it is. Apparently I never published it. So here goes.
Monday Night Raw
1. Twitter polls, and why they work out. So, I voted for Punk to face Miz just like any good little Mizfit on Monday, but when a crowd favorite like Rey Mysterio is one of the options, you pretty much know immediately who is going to win. And after some thought, I think that this turned out most beneficial overall for any of the options, especially if we were always going to see the other two men in competition later that night. Punk is the only guy that Rey could have gone up against and lost, and not look like a step back in some fashion. We did end up seeing Rey/Miz on Friday, but as far as Monday's poll is concerned, I think we got the best pair of matches we could have asked for.
2. And in this corner... So Shawn Michaels of course showed up while the 'E was in his home town, and then his BFF's SummerSlam opponent showed up, with his Mouth, and reiterated Brock's intention to decimate HHH in their match. Shawn Michaels said something about it being personal (I dunno about that... maybe after next Monday?), and Brock Lesnar made an ominous comment about Shawn never having been in the ring with him and seeing him before SummerSlam. Okay, business aside (and it was kind of a shit business segment altogether, only Heyman could save it), the big thing that we were supposed to get out of this is that Shawn Michaels intends to be in Triple H's corner at SummerSlam. It's been a while since being in someone's corner was a big deal, and I kind of like this. It's not about ridiculous stipulations or lengthy feuds built on jealousy or greed or any of the other deadly sins. It's about, "I'm in this guy's corner, and that's why he'll win."
3. Damien Sandow is a Motherfucking Prophet. We at Girls Watch Wrestling love to dance along with the Funkasaurus' music as much as anyone else, but his star has been on a pretty steady (but still happy) constant for a while. Damien Sandow has done nothing but rise, faster and faster, since he debuted, and this week he took his Quest to Enlighten the Universe one step further by completely destroying Brodus Clay before he even made it all the way down the ramp. Oh, the heat! THE HEAT!! He's well on his way to being way beyond Our Martyr and Intellectual Savior and instead simply being Our Wrestling God.
I know, I didn't talk about CM Punk's Headset Promo, but really it was kind of the same stuff as last week, except that he acknowledged that he let people walk all over him, and that it ends now. And then he got destroyed by Big Show. I do need to mention it here, though, because I need to make reference to it later.
TNA Impact
1. Look everyone, it's the TV Champion! It's pretty sad that the Television Title can't see the light of day on television, unless of course the champion is competing for the Tag Team Championship, out of nowhere, with absolutely no match history in the last month, with a guy who also has no match history in the last month and who is still so green you can actually see vines growing out of his ears. Seriously? How does that work? "Hey, Dixie, I know I haven't been defending my TV Title every week like Hulkster promised I would, but Garrett and I would really like another title that we can totally bury. Is it cool if we give that a shot?"
2. Samoa Joe is Pissed: 2012. 2011's Joe is Pissed tour didn't come of anything, unfortunately, and I have been rooting for the guy in this year's series. And it has reached that point in the Bound For Glory series where Joe gets pissed off. So he took a page from his good buddy Punk's book, and came out between matches to grab a headset and declare that HE, not AJ, not Kurt Angle, and not Christopher Daniels, was going to pick up the 20 points in their Bound For Glory match this Sunday at Hardcore Justice. It was delivered every bit as intensely as Punk's, and when it happened, I thought Punk won the Headset-Off. But now I think it's too close to call, really.
3. Roode v. Aries is on. So we had us a good old-fashioned contract signing on the show this week, and actually as far as contract signings go it was pretty tame. Bobby Roode didn't want to sign the contract because it state that if he lost he didn't get another opportunity at the title while Aries was champion. Aries thought he was sure making a lot of noise for a guy who was so confident he would win, but he offered up a new verbal agreement instead, and waived his obligatory rematch. Everyone shook hands, the guys knocked over some furniture, and everyone left happy. The thing I like best about Bobby Roode's whole stance is the way he makes "fluke" a two-syllable word, every. single. time.
Friday Night Smackdown
1. Bryan/AJ/Kane love triangle, continued. AJ showed up as a special guest of Booker T's to mediate a disagreement between Daniel Bryan and Kane. She explained that she didn't want to see them come out and attack each other every week, and that she made their SummerSlam match together, because she sees them both as amazing athletes. She ordered Daniel Bryan to play nice, and requested that the two men shake on it. There's a littler more to this segment, Kane attacked Bryan, AJ gave him praise from the ramp, and HOLY CRAP it should be illegal to make a 7-foot destruction machine look adorable, but Kane somehow managed a little smile. Anyway, here's the point I wanted to make. When AJ asked them to shake hands, and they just stood there, I was seeing Kane's thought pattern of, "I, uh. I don't shake hands. I just destroy people. I kind of just had this thing with Randy Orton a few months ago where we fought at WrestleMania because I shook his hand in a moment of weakenss once. I've purged myself of weakness now. So, yeah, I'm not... Oh, god, you really want to shake my hand? Um... EMERGENCY PLAN, BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF DANIEL BRYAN." Or, you know, something like that. The point is, Continuity.
2. Midcard Hell Heats Up. Jinder Majal mocked Ryback for beating the same two guys every week, and basically challenged Ryback by inviting him to watch Majal do the same. So Jinder crushed two no-name local athletes, and afterwards, Ryback showed up, Jinder ducked out of the ring, and Ryback crushed the already crushed featherweights again. I actually liked the promo from Jinder here, it was to the point, and intense without being overbearing. And it finally gives Ryback something to do since Jinder's whole message basically equated to, "Two at a time, that's nice. But you haven't fought me yet."
3. History Reincarnated, Act 2. Three words: THE HIGHLIGHT REEL. That's literally all I needed to see to be excited about this segment. I wrote extensively on Wednesday about the Jericho/Ziggler feud, and how it mirrors the Jericho/Michaels feud in 2002, so this segment was definitely bound to happen. And OMG did it ever deliver, even better than I imagined! Vickie informed Jericho that Ziggler would not be appearing on his show, so Jericho responded by insulting Vickie for 5 minutes. When Vickie had had enough, she said that was the very reason he wouldn't be showing. Jericho turned back into Y2J just before ducking a briefcase shot from Ziggler who showed up from under the ring. Jericho laid out Ziggler, and then turned his attention to Vickie, and before I could even finish wondering "Is he gonna hit the woman on purpose this time????" Ziggler got back up, clocked Jericho with the briefcase, and he left with Vickie, truly looking for the first time like THE guy to beat.
4. An unexpected extra with an unexpected treat. I had more than three things to say about Friday's show, and I would be completely remiss if I didn't mention the absolute show-stealing match between Antonio Cesaro and Christian. I didn't think a whole lot of it going in, but this was a match full of back-and-forths and counters and just amazing wrestling all around. Cesaro really looked like he was going to win, until Christian speared him out of nowhere to pick up the win. However, as he was celebrating in the corner, he was distracted by Aksana, and Cesaro threw him outside the ring, and followed that up by slamming him into the barrier. Cesaro may now be getting the second-biggest push in the company behind Dolph Ziggler. I will certainly begin to look forward to seeing him on my television.
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